Today I went to a gelato shop to get free coffee from a friend of mine who works there. He made me soy flat white and gave me an awsome brownie even though I didn’t ask for it. But i am so sick of chocolate after all the sweets I had these days and after making+ tasting hazelnut chocolate spread, even the sight of chocolate makes me feel like puke…so I didn’t enjoy the brownie and the flat white confirmed me that black coffee is my only choice in HK. Hmm…I really should stop eating too much sugary stuff, they really make me feel sick.
I start to doubt if I will ever get into a serious long term relationship. I may end up like Joey in Friends, which is quite sad. I feel I am so damaged that even if one day someone shows up and willing to give me what I deserve, I don’t even know how to give him a proper response. Maybe it is because that I am so used to the big hole in my soul that having it filled doesn’t seem that necessary anymore.
No nightmares tonight please. It is really not pleasant, especially when living alone, which itself is unpleasant enough.